Where is Your Happiness? Past, Present, or Future?

Achieving a level of personal happiness previously unknown is closer than you think. Much closer. But first, it's important to stay in touch with the present.
"Stay in touch with the present? I'm thinking?I'm already IN the present!"

Well, certainly we all are in the present, since there is nowhere else to be, but that doesn't mean our thoughts are in the present. And therein lay the challenges to our own personal happiness.
We as humans are the rarest of all species in that not only can we think, but we can think about our thinking.

And you can use this process of being aware of your self-thoughts to help you achieve contentment. It's important for you to challenge what you see and believe. This insures that your view of the world matches reality. So often what we believe is the truth, is nothing more than glimpses of the past, present, and future.

We often take only the bad from the past, quickly breeze through the present, and falsely make up the future. The result is frequently guilt about your imperfect past, anxiety about a future that doesn't exist, and impatience with the Now.

But it is the Now which can help us to live our lives today, fully alive, happy and content.
To prove the value of the present to yourself, try this:
Take a moment and sit in a comfortable place and observe.
What do you see? Describe the images around you.
What sounds are there? How many can you hear?
Can you smell different smells? (Some are pleasant, some maybe not!)
Tell yourself how the surfaces around you feel, the chair, the rug under your feet, the tightness or looseness of your clothing.
And finally, what tastes are apparent in your mouth?

Take a few minutes and reconnect with the world as you experience it in the now.
If you are like most people, what you experienced is a wonderful feeling of aliveness. Rarely do we allow ourselves the opportunity to enjoy the moment. But the moment is the only reality we know. It is exactly the way it should be and it cannot be anything more than that.

But we repeatedly make it out to be different. And by doing so, we have lost the opportunity to fully experience the rain, the children playing, the learning to be achieved by listening to the world seen through a grandparent's eyes, or a friend sharing one of his or her own moments. Too often we are too caught up in what will happen, or what has happened, to experience what IS happening.

This is not to say that planning for the future is unimportant, or that reminiscing is not useful and enjoyable in itself. But unfortunately, too often we become entangled in a future that has not happened and become stifled by our predictions.

We run from the saber tooth tiger that no longer exists in our modern day world. The tiger has been replaced with confronting a friend, giving a speech, driving over a bridge, or feeling discomfort from changing a habit. We create absolute horror from an uncertain future that we make real in the moment.

Staying in the moment awards you the opportunity to see the world as it is, not as you believe it should be. It allows you to observe the truth, to look at real data, not information couched in fears and anxiety.

And it is this truth, which will allow you to enjoy yourself, others, and the world around you. Because, it is exactly as it should be. You can manage any life event that presents itself. Why?? Because everyone does. You can choose to do it with pain or without pain. The evidence for these statements is present in the moment.

7 Unique Ways To Make Someone Smile

Do you want to put a smile on someone's face? Maybe make their day a little bit brighter? It doesn't have to take much time or money on your part. In fact, many things can be done as a part of your normal routine and cost little or nothing. You won't know how many people are encouraged by your kindness because smiles are contagious.

Try out one or more of these 7 ways today to put smiles on their faces.

1. Write an encouraging note to others that have encouraged you or that need encouragement. Handwritten notes that are given to encourage, not just for thanking someone for a gift, are rare. That makes handwritten notes even more special. Start a new practice of sitting down and writing an encouraging note on a regular basis. You just might start an epidemic!
2. Take a friend out to lunch or invite her to your home for a meal. You will get to know each other even better than you do right now. If you feel like being more adventurous, throw a party for several of your friends and put smiles on a multitude of faces.
3. Give someone an inspirational book to read. You will feel good doing it, reading the book will change the person, and they will think of you every time they read it.
4. Ask a friend or relative if you can take care of their kid(s) for a day or evening. If you have been a parent, you know the value of being able to have a few hours of "adult time" without worrying about the children. Don't wait to be asked to baby-sit when it is required. Offer to do it at a time when the parent can do something fun and relaxing.
5. Deliver a meal to someone you know that is sick or having a rough time. We have all been sick and know the last thing you want to do is be out of bed. There are also times when life is tough and it is hard to do all of the daily chores. You can be a tremendous help by providing a meal that can be enjoyed.
6. Volunteer time to supporting your local church or charity. Every minute you dedicate to a church or charity will cause many smiles. You will put a smile on the face of each leader just for helping without being asked. You will also be putting smiles on the faces of those that are being helped through the organization.
7. Thank everyone that supports you throughout the day. The list of those that you come in contact with is endless. Remember family and friends, secretaries, co-workers, teachers, Sunday school teachers, pastors, store employees, janitors, gas station attendants, those that deliver your mail and newspaper, and servers at restaurants.

What is the Ultimate Lifestyle?

First of all, it's different for different people. There are no rules or formulas. For some people, it means a lot of money, lots of "stuff," a fast-paced and "jet-set" sort of lifestyle. For others, it means a very simple, slow-paced life that focuses on service to others. And for others, it's every possible scenario in between these two "extremes."
There's no right or wrong lifestyle, or good or bad lifestyle.
There's just what works for you -- and it will likely change over time. I know it has for me.
No matter how you end up defining Ultimate Lifestyle for yourself, now and in the future, there are 8 components that must be considered:

1) Income Streams
To live your Ultimate Lifestyle, you must have income streams flowing that allow you to pay your bills and finance all the "extras" you prefer. To me, the ultimate target to shoot for in this arena is to have income streams flowing whether you "show up" for "work" or not, so you can choose what you want to show up for (even if it continues to be what you call "work" or a "job.").
That's what I've been able to achieve by applying my Invisible Path/11th Element strategies combined with direct marketing on and off the Internet.
Having income streams flowing whether you show up or now seems like "pie in the sky" to many people, but it's actually very attainable in today's world. You'll learn more about how to do it in future issues.

2) Emotions and Beliefs
Many people fail to create their Ultimate Lifestyle because they have emotional blocks, issues, or beliefs (what I call "p.s's." or "master biography files") that hold them back. Other people have produced extraordinary results and could live their Ultimate Lifestyle, but their blocks, issues or beliefs prevent them from doing it -- or fully enjoying it.
Therefore, living The Ultimate Lifestyle must include having access to resources and inner skills that allow you to uncover and remove, heal, or release any blocks, issues or beliefs that hold you back. You'll learn more about how to do that in future issues.

3) Fulfillment and Satisfaction
Whether you have a 9-5 job and career, you're a full-time mom, or whatever you do with your time, a big part of living The Ultimate Lifestyle means getting as much fulfillment and satisfaction from what you spend your time on as possible.
Many people don't ask for this, don't focus on this, and therefore don't get it. You must make it part of your intention and focus!

4) Living Environment
How and where do you want to live? In the mountains? In the big city? On the water? Multiple homes? Do you want to live in a big home or a small home? Is privacy or seeing beautiful scenery out your windows important to you? Do you like modern furnishings, antiques, or an eclectic mix? Living the Ultimate Lifestyle means asking these questions and having a home base that nourishes you at a very deep level. My family recently moved to Charlottesville, Virginia in pursuit of the nourishing living environment we craved -- and we got it, even better than we expected!

5) Relationships
What good is having income streams, a healthy emotional life, empowering belief systems, a great living environment, and a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction from how you spend you time if you're alone (and don't want to be) or your relationships with significant others (parents, siblings, kids, associates, etc.) are a mess? Believe me, I know about this one from long personal experience (before meeting my wife, Cecily).
Therefore, living The Ultimate Lifestyle must include having access to resources and inner skills that allow you to attract, build, and maintain healthy relationships.

6) Health
Again, what good is having income streams, a healthy emotional life, empowering belief systems, a great living environment, fulfillment and satisfaction, and great relationships if you have health problems that drag your quality of life into the gutter?
Dr. Robert Lindberg says, "We spend most of our life gaining wealth and we then spend most of our wealth on gaining back our health."
Living The Ultimate Lifestyle means having access to knowledge, resources, and skills that allow you to get healthy, stay healthy, and quickly resolve difficulties if and when they arise. I discussed some of the resources I use for this in previous issues, and will continue to share them in future issues

7) Time
You can have income streams, a healthy emotional life, empowering belief systems, a great living environment, fulfillment and satisfaction, great relationships and health and if you don't have any time to do what you love, to follow your non-work passions, or to truly enjoy anything, what's the point? I know many people who could absolutely be living their Ultimate Lifestyle, but they choose to work too much, to the detriment of their quality of life. That's too bad -- to have the choice and ability and not do it.

8) Wealth Building, Management, and Responsibility
The final component to living The Ultimate Lifestyle is having systems in place that allow you to use your income streams to create wealth (as you define it), manage it, grow it, protect it, structure your financial and business affairs for maximum efficiency and personal benefit, and find ways of contributing and giving back (if that's important to you, which it is to me and my wife).

Uncover Emotional Secrets and Live a Happier Life

Can you remember a time when you became a little irritated with someone and made a sharp comment that may have hurt, one which you later regretted? Have you ever writhed in the pain of emotional agony over some loss or missed opportunity? Do you recall a time when you felt so overwhelmed by emotion that you withdrew from everything and everyone? In any of these cases to a lesser or greater degree the emotional part of your brain has produced a questionable response or perhaps a response that you may have regretted later.

Researchers generally agree that there is an appropriate 'alarm' system in the brain. This system effectively overrides the thinking part of your brain in emergencies and causes an action or reaction that can be life saving.

The same system causes you problems when it creates inappropriate and unreasonable responses in your daily life in non-life threatening situations. Maybe your loved ones see your anger and it hurts them or your relationship to them. Perhaps you experience other consequences that would have been averted had you greater control over your emotional brain.
You can exert control over the reactionary part of your gray matter. The first step is realizing why these unwanted and seemingly uncontrollable responses happen. Just being cognizant that your emotional alarm system sometimes triggers at inappropriate times is half the battle. With awareness, you will be primed to take the next step.

Using your will to produce a calmer state is the second step. You'll want to exert some effort from the rational or thinking part of your brain. Your thinking mind must not be timid and should be a bit stronger in applying a conscious influence over your emotional reactions. You can learn to control the alarm response with persistence and patience and reset the threshold to a more appropriate 'setting'.

Once you begin to recognize the emotional response before it happens, you begin to develop the ability to stop that response and engage the more rational part of your brain.
When successful, you will find that you no longer 'snap' at others. You will be happier and your emotional side will not run ramped like an out of control team of horses racing away with the wagon of your rationality.

Instead, you may find yourself becoming calmer, more relaxed and better able to handle situations in a way that helps everyone and allows the wonderful person that you truly are to shine through.

Developing a more compassionate and kinder nature may help. Becoming less quick to judge a situation and more understanding of the perceived transgressions of others may be useful in resetting the threshold of your emotional alarm system.

Ridding yourself of thoughts of arguing or fighting with others may also leave you in a better state of mind. Allowing things to happen naturally and letting go of the need to be in control of every situation will allow you to feel better about yourself and the world around you.

Consider practicing that sage-like advice that comes from a most unusual source, bumper stickers. You have probably seen the ones that say, "I practice random acts of kindness' If you actively do so, you may find your threshold for emotional responses naturally adjusting upwards.

Checking inappropriate responses is a great reason to pay attention to your emotions and feelings. Yet, there is a an even more positive benefit that hasn't been mentioned yet.

7 Keys to a Happy Life

1. Do not act in order to receive a payoff.
   This is what is causing much of our discomfort as individuals and a society. As soon as you act with the purpose of receiving something, you have removed love from the act. The goal is to act as if all your needs are met, then all your thinking and behavior comes from a different perspective. You also find that you act more effectively to get those things that you truly want, because you are acting and thinking as if you already have them. The alternative is acting and thinking as if you don't, and guess what, you don't. The state of mind of having something creates it, not the other way around.
   The place you see this most is in relationships. The more you need in relationships, the less you get. This is simply because you are saying that you are not whole until someone else meets those needs that can never be met. Often what happens is that you eventually get the opposite because you are trying to show yourself that you must look inside. Once again, in relationships you must look to be loving, respectful, and accepting, because this is saying that you have all these things to give. In the end these things will be overflowing from you. Remember if you want to have something, give it, because you must have it if you can give it. Abundance is another area this concept plays a major role. The more you say you need and operate from a place of not having enough, the more that state of mind will be created physically. This is why the very wealthy can sometimes feel impoverished, and the very poor can sometimes feel wealthy. Remember that perception is everything and that your thinking, feelings, and actions come from those perceptions.
   
2. You are the only judge of your life and what you will judge in the last moment of your life, is how well you loved.
   Believe it or not, you do not really care what you accomplish in your life. How much you acquire, and how successful you are will not mean a thing when you decide to leave your body. Imagine that you are all living your own movie. Each movie has different characters, a different plot, and a different setting, yet the goal for each conclusion is the same. The happy ever after ending for every movie, is that the main character loved well at least once in their life in spite of circumstances. You have probably noticed that people on their deathbed, do or say something loving, often out of character, before they go. This is because they are closer to their spirit and may finally realize that to love well was their goal. Imagine if you lived with that consciousness while you were healthy and had time. Everything else physical comes to an end when you die, but people can take your love with them long after you die.
3. You are perfect, were perfect, and always will be perfect.
   To the degree that you believe this, is how much physical success you will have. The people who believe in themselves and their ability are the ones who have lasting success in their lives. Belief creates reality. Some people have success for fleeting periods of time, but it doesn't last if their belief in themselves is dependent on what they do or what others think of them.
   Belief in yourself is not like what you consider ego or arrogance. To truly believe in this perfection, you must also believe in the inherent perfection of all people and things. Remember how all things were created. Therefore you do not believe you are better than anyone, even though you may act better and have more success because you know the truth about yourself. You never have to judge or be right because you know that you cannot make anyone believe in themselves, though you can show them what it looks like. Your belief in the constant perfection of creation allows you to know that you are successful always because you cannot be anything else. Then what you choose to create will be a success and you know you can create anything.
4. You act based on what you know.
   This sounds simple but is actually very profound. In order to act in a truly loving way, you must know what love really is. To be successful at anything, you need to know what success is. How many people are attempting to be successful in relationships, but don't know what to do because they have never learned what a loving, successful relationship looks like. If you do not know what to do, you will do what you have learned, or try something that you think might work, sometimes getting lucky.
   You cannot program a computer without knowing what actions you must perform. If you must learn things because it is so difficult to remember in your physical state, perseverance, patience, and belief in yourself come in handy. Sometimes you have housed yourself in a body which does not allow you to be successful at certain physical endeavors. This you do because you choose to limit yourself so that you can focus on your higher desire to succeed at something else. If you were physically capable of the other things, you may not choose to do the thing that you really want to accomplish on a spiritual level. Many handicapped people know this and don't like it when people feel sorry for them. They may not know why they don't like sympathy, but they know it feels wrong. Believe this. You have chosen the body conditions, and situations you experience. This is done on a spiritual level and for good reason. Your goal is to find out what you can do with it, not feel bad about what you cannot do. So if you want to run a marathon, but your legs don't work, don't focus on not running a marathon. Find out what you can do because you cannot run a marathon.
5. Fear is your biggest enemy, and can only be conquered by faith.
   Fear tells you that to only love will not be enough. Fear and faith cannot coexist or control behavior together. One or the other has to take over. Believe it or not, which one takes over is your choice. This may not appear so, because many of you have developed a habit of acting on your fear. Remember that you can act with faith even though you are feeling fear. Which habit have you developed? This goes back to the role of emotions and how you have developed a script, so to speak, about which behaviors go with which emotions. When you say you are depressed, you are really labeling your set of behaviors and thoughts. A good experiment is to consciously act in a way that your feeling does not describe. For instance, if you are angry, try smiling and saying something nice. If depressed, exercise and tell someone what a beautiful day it is. Most importantly, if afraid, do the thing that you are afraid of if it is in your best interest (jumping off a building may not be included in this).
   You may find that these strategies make you feel like a fraud, but they will show you that you can do whatever you choose in spite of what you are feeling, including loving. Remember to use the feeling as a message, but choose the behavior that most effectively and lovingly responds to the message. Knowing that you can choose gives you real power over your life.
   I understood the concept of faith. To me it is a powerful word that literally leads to mental invincibility. I was really beginning to feel it in my life.
   The next principle takes from the last and is perhaps the most difficult for all of you.
6. No action is involuntary, including your thoughts.
   Many of you may have at least come to believe that this is true for overt behaviors, but still struggle with applying it to thoughts. The scope of this principle is out of most human conception. There is not even a body function that is completely involuntary, though the medical profession would like you to believe that they are. Most of you simply do not know the force that controls your so-called autonomic nervous system. Once you really learn where and how thoughts work, you will know this force.
   Many of the things you say you are (shy, stupid, alcoholic, etc.), have (depression, diabetes, cancer, attention deficit disorder, etc.), or feel (sad, angry, love, etc.), are actually verbs, not nouns. Whether you are doing a behavior, having a body function, or thinking, you are on some level doing something voluntarily. All of it, every event that happens in your life, and in your body, is a product of thought.
   You are probably thinking that there is no way that you could voluntarily be doing cancer, but it does begin with a thought, and your body is completely controlled by thought. Do you ever wonder why you don't die in dreams very often? Because if you really think you are dead, you are. After being diagnosed with cancer you have more thoughts about that, then more thoughts about your prognosis and course of disease. If you could examine a record of every thought you have ever had, conscious and unconscious, you could find the explanation of everything you experience in your life. We have talked about thought and belief before, but what is important is that you know what is having these thoughts and how you can be the decision maker about the thoughts you have.
   When you are born, there is one source of thoughts, your soul, spirit, higher self, God, whatever you choose to call it. This source has all the ultimate truths. Over time (and not a very long time) another aspect of consciousness emerges, which you can call the learned self. This is like an observer who begins to notice that you are separate, have needs for physical survival, and can experience pain. This part continues to define itself through experience. It also defines everything and everyone around it. Within a short time, by about six years, this learned self has all but completely taken over, and is giving commands to your body and the universe by its constant thoughts. Once a thought or belief is established, it may never again be consciously verbalized in your mind again. You may call these echo thoughts because they are no longer conscious, but like an echo, they continue to fill every space available. These thoughts or beliefs are usually in the form of a conclusion and are the most constant, therefore most creative thoughts of all. They begin to operate behind the scenes very powerfully and without conscious attention.
   Thought is the creative force of the universe, but it needs to have conviction and consistency to manifest in physical reality. Thought is like hammering a nail. Usually one hit will not put it all the way in. You must decide where you want it and hit it until it is all the way in so it can't easily be pulled out. This is how the echo thoughts work. They continually hammer at the nail until it is very hard to get out. Unless they are recognized, even if you try to pull them out by replacing them with other thoughts, the echo thoughts will hammer themselves back in even if they are part way out.
   This is why it is so difficult for you to change your life circumstances. You are not often aware of the echo thoughts which continually maintain the circumstances. Even if you do things to change the situation, you will find yourself in a similar one at some point if the echo thought does not change. How do you change an echo thought if it is out of awareness? Remember that everything in the universe is a manifestation of thought. If you are unsure what your echo thoughts are, there are two ways to find out. Both of these require guessing and detective work.
   First, you could simply look at the circumstances throughout your life and ask what a person with this life might believe. Ask people close to you who know about your life, what they think you believe about yourself and the world. Most people will come up with similar guesses if they have some information about your situation and they are willing to be honest. This is simply working backwards from the manifested to the manifesting thought. Even if you doubt that these beliefs are present, remember that you have lost conscious awareness of them. Therefore act as if they are true based on the evidence in your life, and you will benefit anyway. If you do not challenge a belief, you will provide evidence for it in your life, period.
   A second way to accomplish awareness of your echo thoughts is to look at the major messages you got from your parents, or whomever raised you. One or both parents taught you to make conclusions about yourself, the world, and other people, by their words, actions, or other more subtle means. You likely took these conclusions and accepted them as real guiding principles in your life. You wore them like glasses which you saw everything through, and they determined how you acted, thought, and reacted throughout your life. It is then inevitable that the consequences of these accumulated acts will give you what you have today.
   Most important among the echo thoughts are the I am commands that are constantly working in your self-talk. These almost always come from the pre-adult years with evidence being provided throughout your teens and adulthood. Some of the more common commands you people are giving yourselves are? I am stupid? I am a quitter? I am worthless? I am a loser? I am weak and powerless? I am fat and ugly. You also make conclusions about the future: I will never be successful; I deserve to be punished and treated badly, My life sucks; I will never be happy; I always screw up; There are no decent men out there.
   All of these have endless variations which may be more specific or more general. You were fortunate to discover these as your energy blockages or bumpers as you called them. Meditation and an honest inner enquiry can also give you the awareness you need.
   Once you have this awareness, you can apply the sixth principle, that all thoughts and behaviors are voluntary. This is where you must be completely dedicated to find another echo thought and corresponding behaviors. This requires daily practice in all situations with conscious intent. This must take priority over all else for you to manifest these new things in your life. The hardest part is persevering until you see results. Remember that for many years you have burned the old ways in to the universal framework. The old thoughts have become like a template which will be used until another one is complete and more prominent.
7. Gratitude is the antidote for unhappiness.
   This is perhaps the easiest yet most powerful truth. When there is gratitude their can be no other feeling than joy. There is always something to be grateful for even in the most dire of situations. You must find a way to focus on that which you have and are grateful for at all times. Even if you have to look at the fact that you are breathing because you can't find anything else. Gratitude brings with it more things to be grateful for. The universe is waiting for you to be grateful so that it can give you more.
   If you are dying, be grateful for your life. If someone you love is dying, be grateful for the time you had with them. If you are broke, be grateful for your health and other's prosperity. If you are lonely, be grateful for the time with yourself. It is up to you to find and focus on gratitude. If you are envious of what someone else has, remember you are all one and be grateful for what they have.
   In the end you have a choice to be grateful or not. If you choose not to, don't expect to be happy for any great lengths of time. If you choose to be grateful because the sun comes up, you can be happy all the time in spite of your circumstances, and you can choose to change your circumstances without need because you are already grateful for what you have. If you want more, that is fine, but be grateful for what you have until you have more.
   Finally, always be grateful that you know the truth about yourself and your connection to all things including God, for these things are everlasting.

Getting To The Root Of Unhappiness

Many people live in clutter, emotionally eat themselves into overweight, live in debt, hate their jobs and otherwise live unhappy lives, unable and seemingly unwilling to change. Why? What do these have in common? What is the core issue?

Fear, or rather an absence of love.

Fear, and not hate, is the "dark side" or opposite/absence of love, the way darkness is the opposite/absence of light.

Whether your self image is controlled by unhealthy or uncontrolled overweight or fanatic perfection, both stem from fear. In the first, food is used to comfort upset emotions and to retreat into - a true friend that never lets you down. In the latter (and sometimes the former), control over the body supplants a loss of control elsewhere in life, eventually taking over that life.

Clutter is almost always fear-based -
Fear of not having something and needing it, fear of getting rid of something important, fear of leaving oneself open to new experiences (which can't come in because your house - and by extension your life - is already full) and fear of being alone with oneself and one's thoughts (clutter requires so much of our energy to deal with and work around, it can serve as a sort of mental static to keep us too busy to think about important things).

Debt is another symptom of fear -
People get into debt for many fear-based reasons (like needing stuff to make themselves feel better, or for fear of not keeping up with the Jones' and being socially outcast). Another part to this equation is that many people will not get rid of their access to credit (cut up cards, etc) because there is always that "what if an emergency happens and we don't have cash on hand to pay for it?" which is made moot by the fact that most of their credit cards are maxed out anyway. Debt is also a symptom of the fear of doing without, even when carried to extremes. The fear of going without and the feelings of "being without" fancy clothes or expensive meals out is no less than the fear and experience of going without basic clothing and food, although the reality is different.

Working at a job you hate is nothing but fear -
Fear of not having enough, fear of quitting and not being able to find other work (or finding it and being stuck with something even worse), fear of not being to keep up with your "stuff habit" or your debt, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of relying on yourself, fear of doing things differently or out-of-the-box (running your own business, running off to Mexico, etc), fear of letting the family down, fear of "wasting" your education, fear of what other will say, think, fear that your mom/dad/sister/evil art teacher were right and so on.

Fear is the basis for pretty much all human suffering, not counting natural disasters and other acts of God. And the opposite of fear is love. Love creates an ecosphere of calm and plenty, because you know there is enough (if only just enough) and so feel no need to "get mine before someone else does." Nor do you feel the need to hoard (clutter) or gather in more than you can afford (debt) to assure yourself of plenty. In a world of love, all are accepted and loved for their own personal strengths and forgiven their faults, therefore negating the need for drowning in the comfort of stuff and food (debt and overweight), or worrying about what others will think if you quit your job to become a Mexican portrait painter (toxic job). And on and on.

Learn to live with love, for yourself and for others,
Even when they don't meet your standards (even the rich and awful deserve your love, for they serve their purpose, too). Creating a world of love is up to each of us. We cannot wait to see if others take the first step. They are waiting for us.

How To Take Care Of Your Laptop Computer

As the proud owner of a laptop computer, you'll want to keep your machine in the best possible condition.
Aside from cleaning your screen and dusting the keyboard, however, you'll need to take a few extra steps to maintain your laptop's health:

-- Play it cool
A laptop computer generates a lot of heat, especially when running the latest high-powered software. Too much heat and you risk damaging the internal circuitry.
Always try to keep your laptop in a well-ventilated, cool environment. And ensure you don't block the fan grills on the sides, back, or bottom of the machine at any time.

-- Handle the screen carefully
Avoid touching or playing with your LCD screen.
Yes, it might be fun to watch the waves generated by your finger against the screen, but LCD displays are fragile devices that must be cared for.
Take care when cleaning the screen too, and use only approved cleaning materials.
You won't want to pay the money for screen repairs or, even worse - a new machine entirely.

-- Don't drop it
Whatever you do, don't drop your laptop computer! Keep it safe inside of a carrying case when moving around or traveling.
Don't leave it on the edge of a table or on an unstable support of some kind. One ill fated drop to the floor could spell death for your mobile office.
Try to make sure the rubber feet underneath are in good condition and are still attached. This will prevent the device from sliding around accidentally.

-- Be careful with those drinks...
If you need to have a drink while working or playing, be careful not to spill it.
Your laptop computer could suffer the consequences from just a few drops of liquid poured in the right places.
While you probably do eat and drink around it regardless, you will want to occasionally wipe down the edges, the keyboard, the touchpad, and maybe even wipe down the screen to keep any dirt from accumulating.

-- Just say no to viruses
Security wise, make sure you obtain an anti-virus program.
Secondly, keep it updated!
Buying an anti-virus one month and not updating it for the next six really negates it purpose. Your laptop computer could be exposed to hundreds and thousands of new viruses every month if you don't update your virus definitions.
Most anti-virus programs have automatic update methods, eliminating the need for you to have to remember to do it manually.

-- Avoid Pop ups
Pop-ups are particularly annoying on a laptop computer. Trying to close a bunch of windows without a regular mouse can be a nuisance.
You'll want a pop-up blocker, such as the Google Toolbar (located at http://tools.google.com), to prevent these pop- up ads.
Many intrusive forms of advertising, and even some viruses, can install software on your machine by using various forms of pop-ups. It's best to get yourself a blocker and avoid the situation entirely.

-- Use a firewall
Always utilize a firewall on your Internet or network- enabled laptop computer. Even if you use Windows XP's built- in firewall (or purchase one from such companies as Norton), your security will greatly benefit from it.
Blocking out all the unnecessary ports and closing all the loopholes will prevent a hacker or virus from freely entering your hard drive.

So there you go. Combine all of the above tactics and help your laptop enjoy a happier and healthier lifestyle!

5 Ways To Backup Your Data...

The data on your hard drive is the most critical item inside your computer, and the only item which can not be replaced. It may be an unwanted hassle and expense to replace a defective memory module, monitor, or processor, but there is no replacing data once lost.
In addition to the possibility of a simple hard drive failure, the threat of internet borne worms and viruses has become an increasing risk to data loss or corruption. Although you may not be able to provide absolute protection to your hard drive, there are various ways that you can ensure that the data on your hard drive is protected. Five methods of backing up your data are summarized below?

1. USB Flash Drives
Although I am not recommending that flash drives be used for the actual data storage, they are a convenient means of transferring data from one computer to another. Important files can be quickly loaded onto a device such as the MINIDISK-512-DGRY-CS USB 2.0 Flash Drive, and transported to another computer for safe keeping. Installation and operation is extremely simple, and other than perhaps having to install a software driver, the use of a USB flash drive is a matter of having an available USB port on your computer. Just about every computer produced over the last several years has USB ports included, with more modern systems supporting the USB 2.0 standard. USB 2.0 allows for data transfer rates of up to 480 MB/s, which is a tremendous improvement over the original USB speed limit of 12 MB/s, and allows a user to fill their drives with data in a relatively short period of time.
Although the storage capacity of flash drives has increased greatly over the last year or so, users are still limited to common sizes of 512MB and 1GB. Mass storage is obviously not an option, but even 512MB may be enough to backup your "My Documents" folder, several albums of MP3s, or other important files to be stored elsewhere.

2. CD and DVD Writers/Re-Writers
The falling prices of CD and DVD writers/re-writers have made them a staple of just about every modern computer. These devices can typically be found installed in a computer case, but external devices supporting USB 2.0 or Firewire are available for greater flexibility and ease of installation.
A combination drive, such as the NU Technology DBW-521, will provide the user a high speed CD reader/writer, as well as a DVD reader, for under $40. The extremely low price of the drive (and the blank media) makes for an inexpensive means of creating data backups, and the re-writable media increases the convenience by allowing the same disc to be erased and reused many times. The main limitation of using a CD writer for data backups is that the discs are generally limited to a capacity of 700MB per disc. Not nearly enough for a full backup, but adequate for archiving key files.
The popularity of DVD writers/re-writers has surged thanks to dropping prices, and they are pushing the stand alone CD burner towards extinction. DVD media affords the user far more storage capacity than a CD, and DVD burners can generally burn CDs as wells as DVDs. The recent availability of double layer DVD burners, such as the Sony DW-D22A-DO-N, represents a large boost in the capacity of writable DVDs, taking the previous limit of 4.7GB per disc and nearly doubling it to 8.5GB.
With proper storage, CD/DVD media can provide long term storage that can not be jeopardized by hardware failure. The data on a CD or DVD can easily be read by just about any computer, making it a good choice for archiving files that aren't excessively large.

3. External Hard Drives
As the name might imply, external hard drives are generally the same type of drive you might find inside your system, but housed in a smaller, external enclosure of its own. The enclosure will feature at least one data interface (such as Firewire, USB, or Ethernet), and the capacity is only limited by the size of hard drives presently available and the user's budget.
The Ximeta NetDisk is an example of an external hard drive that provides a user the option of connecting an additional 80GB, 120GB, or 160GB of storage to their system by using either a USB 2.0 or Ethernet connection. Installation for such a device is rather simple, and may involve the installation of some basic software, as well as making the necessary connections between the computer and the external enclosure.
The capacity of external hard drives makes them ideal for backing up large volumes of data, and many of these devices simplify the process by including software (or hardware) features to automate the backup.
For example, some Seagate External drives feature a "one-button" backup option right on the case.In addition to being a convenient method of backing up large volumes of files locally, most external hard drives are compact enough to be portable. The inclusion of a common data transfer interface, such as USB, allows an external hard drive to be connected to just about any modern computer for data transfer, or for more than one computer to share the external hard drive as a back up.

4. Additional Hard Drives
By simply adding an additional hard drive to you system, you can protect yourself from data loss by copying it from your primary drive to your secondary drive. The installation of a second hard drive isn't difficult, but does require a basic understanding of the inner working of a computer, which may scare off some users. We do offer a "how-to" section on our site for many tasks such as installing a hard drive into a computer system.
To take the installation of a second hard drive to another level of security and reliability, the hard drives may be installed in a RAID array. RAID stands for a Redundant Array of Independent (or Inexpensive) Disks, and can be configured in several manners. A thorough discussion of RAID and all of its variations would be an article all by itself, but what may be of interest to this discussion is what is known as RAID 1. A RAID 1 array requires two hard drives of equal size to be installed on a RAID controller, which will then mirror one drive to the other in real time. Many motherboards now come with RAID controllers onboard, but the addition of a PCI slot controller card, such as the Silicon Image Sil0680, is an inexpensive purchase that will add RAID to any system. With a RAID 1 array in place, if one hard drive should ever fail, the system won't miss a best by continuing to run on the remaining good drive, and alert the user that one drive may need to be replaced.

5. Online Storage
Online services, such as Xdrive, allow users to upload their files to a server for safe keeping. Although it may be convenient to have the data available wherever an internet connection is available, there are a few limitations.
The services generally charge a monthly fee relative to the amount of storage space required. At Xdrive, for example, 5GB of storage costs $9.95 per month, which can quickly add up to more than one would spend on any of the other options discussed.
Security is supposed to be very tight on these services, but no matter how secure it may seem, it is still just a password keeping prying eyes from your potentially sensitive documents.
The speed of your internet connection will also weigh heavily on the convenience of your backup, and no matter what type of connection you have; it can't compete with local data transfer rates.

Final Words
Although not a comprehensive list of options available for backing up your data, the five items listed provide some simple and relatively affordable means to ensure that your data is not lost. Data loss is an extremely frustrating and potentially costly situation, but one that can be avoided.

A BILL OF ASSERTIVE RIGHTS

Assertiveness is -

• Getting what you want without hurting others.
• Being rational and open.
• Protecting your values and self worth respectively.
• Knowing when to assert and when to give up gracefully
  

Assertive rights -

• You have the rights to judge your own behaviour, thoughts and emotion, and to take the responsibility for their initation and consequences upon yourself.
• You have the right to offer no reasons or excuses for justifying you behaviour.
• You have the right to change.
• You have the right to judge if you are responsible for finding solutions to other people’s problem.
• You have the right to make mistake - and be responsible for them
• You have the right to say, “ I don’t know ”.
• You have the right to be independent of the goodwill of others before coping with them.
• You have the right to be illogical in making decisions.
• You have the right to say , “I don’t understand”.
• You have the right to say , “I don’t care”.
• You have the right to say “no”, without feeling guilty.

Result of negative feelings -

• About self - Anxiety, fear, stress.
• About others - Anger.
• About life - Depression, frustration
  
  
  

What great souls say about happiness

• Happiness is a state of mind, It doesn’t reside in objects.

• Nobody can make you happy except yourself.

• Money can give you everything except happiness.

• Happiness can’t be purchased, it can only be experienced.

• Fountain of happiness is inside you.Don’t make futile attempts to search it outside.

• Even if you are made the king of whole world and are handed over all possessions and objects of pleasures, there is no guarantee that you will be happy.

• Happiness is your true intrinsic nature.It is only to be discovered and not to be acquired from outside.

• The origin of stress is in your mind. Without understanding and controlling mind, it is impossible to eliminate stress.

• Nobody can make you happy unless you allow him to do so.

• Happiness is your valuable treasure.Don’t allow it to be snatched by varying circumstances and petty matters of life.

• Happiness is not an object.It is a state of mind.

• Happiness is measured by the spirit in which you meet the problem of life.

• To seek happiness outside is like trying to lasso a cloud.

• Happiness does not come from what we like to do but from liking what we have to do.

• Happiness is found in little things : a baby’s smile, a letter from a friend, the song of a bird, the sunlight in the window.

• Happiness is like perfume, you can’t spray it on others without getting some on yourself.

• Happiness grows out of harmonious relationships with others, based on attitudes of goodwill, tolerance, understanding and love.

• We are as happy as we make ourselves so.

• Happiness come upon you unaware while you are helping others. ‘Help thy brothers boat across, and lo! thine own has reached the shore.

• The best way to keep yourself happy is to ensure that others are happy.

• Tension is not an object or thing or a situation. It is our reaction towards a thing or a situation, which generate it.

• Happiness is not fulfillment of desire but absence of desire.

• Share it, practice it. Don’t worry ,
  Be happy.
  
  Life is beautiful.
  

Tips to relieve yourself from stress, tension and anxiety. Part - 3

9. No inferiority complex.
Please remember that ultimate potential of all of us is exactly the same. No one is any better or worse than us provided we can explore the potential of our mind through meditation & soul consciousness. The reason being that all souls are exactly same as far as their original attributes are concerned. Hence never compare with others and neither feel inferior nor feel superior to any body.

10. Don’t waste time.
Life is short and very precious .Time is running very past. Every moment we are coming closer to death. It can fall at any moment without notice. Hence don’t waste any time here. We have to achieve maximum in this minimum time. Waste your money and you are only out of money, but waste your time and have lost a part of your life.

11. Control over impulses, observe self-restraint & impatience.
In our daily life, just don’t follow your impulses and start doing or saying anything which comes to your mind. It is a sign of weak mind. Have some checks and controls on your mind and never become its slave. Be the master of your mind and senses. Whatever impulse or urge comes comes in your mind (it comes from your sub conscious mind where these tendencies, desires, patience lie in dormant state) don’t jump over it immediately.
First examine it properly and then accordingly hold it for sometime or ignore it totally. By exercising patience in this manner you will-power and strength will increase gradually – a necessary prerequisite for a successful life. Power of a controlled mind increases in the same fashion as the power of water increases when it is controlled by constructing a dam.

12. Don’t react immediately when provoked.
Whenever you feel disturbed or restless due to some sudden problems or some irrelevant remarks or comments by somebody, avoid reacting immediately or coming under sudden provocation. Allow some to pass and refrain from doing or saying anything as long as disturbance persists in your mind. Under provocation the reasoning power of the mind gets destroyed.

13. Brooding over past & worrying for future.
Present is the most important moment of your life. What matters most to you and to the world right now is what you are at present and not what you were or what you will be. Past should be used only for learning some lessons from it so that these mistakes are not repeated. just forget it like and old movie witnessed by you. There is no death of opportunities in our life to progress. If you have lost some opportunities in the past, you can still catch the train now.

14. You are master of your destiny.
You are hundred percent responsible for what you are in life. You have made you destiny by your own hands. Your past has made your present. Your present will make your future. What you are experiencing today is the fruits of what you have done in the past. Future is still in your hand

Tips to relieve yourself from stress, tension and anxiety. Part - 2

5. Welcome difficulties and problems of life.
We can derive some benefit and learning from every problem of difficulty of life and exploit it to our advantage. This is a wonderful law of life. Everything which happens to us in life is for our good only. In the apparently looking cruel and adverse circumstances is hidden the infinite mercy of god. You have been placed by god exactly where you deserve. Once you play your present successfully, you will be automatically shifted to the next higher place.

6. There is a reason for everything.
Universe has a certain order and everything is bound by a relationship of cause and effect. For every effect there is a cause. Consider all problems as projects and as means to grow and remain even minded in success/failure, gain/loss, praise/insult so as to stop any fresh bondage of karma. It is not the incidents or events which are important but our mental attitude and reaction towards them. World is neither good nor bad. It depends upon how we look at it. Whatever is within us, same appears to us outside.

7. Silence, solitude and self-introspection.
Find some time daily when you are in solitude and in silence and devote this time solely for yourself. Do some self-introspection in this time as to in which areas you need improvements and strengthening. Silence conserves mental energy. Always speak less, speak in low and sweet voice and to the point. There should always be some aim when you talk. Aimless talking should always be avoided.

8. Overcome fears.
Fears are a drain and on our mental energy and are main stumbling blocks to our progress. By the law of attraction, what we fear or doubt, we actually attract those conditions and circumstances. Please remember there is nothing in this world which we really need to fear. Nothing is designed in the universe to harm us. One of the best way to remove fear is to intentionally face and stand before those very things you fear denying mentally that they can do any harm to you, till such time when the fear is totally gone. Also bear in mind this great thing that mishappening is never that fearful and painful as our thought and imagination of that happening. Just face each challenge of life boldly with positive outlook and firm faith in god who only can provide the real security to us.

Tips to relieve yourself from stress, tension and anxiety.- Part-1

1. Concentration-
As physical exercises strengthen the body, concentration increases the strength of mind.
Concentration, in other words, means to learn to remain in the present moment which is the most desirable feature for success and happiness of life.
Mental stability is through detachment & mental turmoil is with attachment.
Concentration and detachment should be practiced simultaneously.

2. Detatchment & Forgetfulness-
Ability to forget and detach from undesirable past is a great quality for acieving success in life.
Though it is sometimes useful to remember but it is often wise to forget.
Strictly speaking, nothing is forgotten, everything is in our subconscious mind; what is meant by word forgetting here is that we should not consciously bring that thing to our mind again and again.

3. Thinking Planned & Positive.
Planned thinking
Unplanned random thinking, day dreaming is a sign of weak mind and indicates that instead of controlling your subconscious mind, (that part of mind where all your urges desires, inclinations lie stored) you are controlled by it. So ensure that only those thought s are in your mind which you really want to have at that moment. It has been noted in a survey that a sizeable portion of one’s life time is spent in wasteful thinking. This can be easily channeled for performing useful activities. You conscious mind should remain fully active, in full awareness and maintain its master status controlling its servant –sub conscious mind.
Positive thinking.
The most important aspect of our life is how we think. Negative thinking weakens the mind, makes it restless, agitated and impure. Convert every negative situation into positive one by adjusting your mental attitude. By having positive thinking, you will attract to yourself favourable physical conditions and environment because by law of physic attraction, you attract physical conditions and circumstances towards you according to your thoughts.
By remaining positive you create an aura of positive vibrations around you which not only benefit you but all others coming into contact with you. This aura also protects you from the attack of any negativity released by others.

4. Reduce emotional involvement & take things easy.
The root cause of our suffering is our emotional involvement while dealing with various incidents, situations and circumstances of life.
We should watch & tackle all worldly objects and situations objectively like a spectator as if they are different & we are different & we only have a association with them.
The cause of our emotional involvement with worldly things is that we are taking them too seriously which actually we should not.
We should realise that no difficulties or problems are permanent. They all will pass. Such is the law. Everything is in constant motion & change. Nothing is permanent & static here.Taking things seriously results in formation of deep impressions in our sub-conscious mind which results in development of various prejudices in our mind and in favour of and against various things and reduces its ability to see things objectively.